I’m so mad… thoughts on suicide… and people living in denial

I’ve changed this post like 5 times. I don’t know why, but I am so mad. I think it is part because so many people live in denial….. I’m so pissed right now at all the ignorant people in this world that just like to turn a blind eye to peoples pain…. and then it is too late. Maybe I’m just mad at myself because I did the same thing. Every 16 seconds someone commits suicide. I wish more people would take it seriously and really pay attention. Most people JUST DONT WANT TO GET INVOLVED. Lots of people I know won’t even read my book because it is too hard to hear about the pain I went through and what my father did to end his pain. People live in denial. THEY JUST DONT WANT TO KNOW. They want to keep living in their fantasy land buying their $10 Starbucks and watching TMZ For the latest gossip to judge people. Lots of people put themselves first before others. Lots of people just don’t want to hear people are even depressed. They will defriend people or block their news feeds or stop associating with the person. I wrote this book to help people that have been left behind. I wish I could keep it as free on Amazon more than every 90 days. However it is only a .99 download or free if you have Amazon prime. Every 16 seconds someone kills themselves and leaves dozens of people to mourn forever cursed with a lifetime of Pain. I wish every person cared about every death in this world. People are so shocked by Mr. Williams death because they wanted him to be happy. There is NO POSSIBLE WAY a man with that much success and a man that full of life could be ever be sad. ” Why couldn’t he count his blessings? But, he made people laugh all the time? I just don’t get it.” (things I’ve read on line) People don’t want to get it. They want to live in their perfect Utopia and get raging mad if someone dents their car or there is a fly in their house. They want to get upset over a pair of shoes they couldn’t buy and not their next door neighbor hanging themselves. I’m so mad right now.

I can just keep going… I don’t know HOW MANY improv classes I took at Second City and IOWest, how many shows I had to suck it up and perform in, and how many show I saw that used suicide as humor. Is it funny now? Was it funny then to pretend to hang yourself or shot yourself in the head?
Is it really entertainment to watch people kill themselves on TV or in movies? Why is it so much better to read fiction than non fiction? Its ok to read a novel about horrible murders, but people can read a memoir on it? It’s too real? Yeah, its real….. Real people really die and lots of people left behind are really sad for the rest of their lives. I won’t be surprised if a lot of my improv people defriend me and I really don’t care, because now you care about someone that has killed themselves? I bet suicide won’t come up in a show tonight at Second City and IOwest. What about before this? All of the other people that killed themselves every 16 seconds? What about them? Go ahead, debate me. I would like to hear your opinion.






About Vanessa Bednar

I am an actor, a writer, a producer, a mom, an adventurer.

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