Sometimes the people in life you want to please most let you down.  Sometimes you don’t appreciate the people that try to please you the most.  Is it we are trying to “win over” the people that are “just on the fence” about us?  Why?  Maybe it is just part of our human nature to not be happy with what we already have.  When is enough enough?  When are we happy just having the people love us that already love us.  Why do we find a need to go back to people that continually let us down, make us cry?  Why is is so hard to walk away and just accept that it is not going to work…. to just stop trying?  If this person or that person finally likes us or loves us will it be enough or will that accomplishment be made and now its time to try to win over a harder mark?  We change for people that at one point liked us the way that we were.  We may never ask them to change, yet will change ourselves so easily to please them.

Eventually it will all backfire.  The more you go out of your way to please people the more they end up disliking you because they no longer have to try to please you.  You are no fun anymore. You are not a sport. You are too easy, they have you. They don’t appreciate you or how much you have tried to love them.  In the age of texting if someone does’t respond with in a certain reasonable amount of time.. or never, its a bad sign… Relationships.. when I was a teenager and someone was going to break up with me I would get the: “We need to talk” line.  Now I guess people don’t do that.  It is just a simple text of: “Sorry it isn’t working out”… or a long text converted to an mms message of how horrible you are.  I don’t know what is worse.  Every time I watch the second Twilight movie and Edward takes Bella out to the woods “to talk” I cringe…. “It’s just not working out” eventually gets spewed out after 10 sentences of torture figuring just exactly what he is saying.  Maybe a text would have been less painful.

I think we all need to learn to appreciate more the people that already love us.  The people that go out of their way to help us or do nice things for us.  We need to surround ourselves with the people that help us grow as a person and not the ones that stifle us or are mean to us.  Just walking away can be hard.  I for one am not good at it.  Because of losing my father, from turning my back on him, I ALWAYS want to give someone “one more try”. In the end the friendship dissolves…. never on my part… but always “my fault” in the others eyes. However, I think I need it to be that way.  I always need to give it my all… give it 100%.  There was something that drew me to that person to begin with.. something that pressed me to keep trying.  However, when that is done you reflect on all of the friends that never ever left you… never asked you to change…. liked/loved you for exactly who you are…. and who are there still now…. and you pick up like you have never left their side.

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About Vanessa Bednar

I am an actor, a writer, a mom, an adventurer.

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