Summer Vacation

What I learned on Summer Vacation: I dont care how old you are…. It is necessary…. I could have ended the night face down on the end of a culldelasack puking…. but I didnt….thanks to friends. I ended up with a feeling of freedom….. The feeling of being responsible for the last 13 years because I am a parent, you can never truly let go. …. Cause if you do the unthinkable will happen and someone is gonna die. Release…freedom….being yourself….. now caring who sees….. I jumped up and down singing to a band playing 80’s songs (my era) AND THEY HAD WIGS ON….everyone knew….. I pretended I was baby in the movie Dirt Dancing and ran and jumped to be lifted up…. The goal wasnt reached, but at least we didnt fall on our asses. I met some incredible new friends and even though they are just starting off in the adult over 21 world I KNOW we will always remain friends. Why? Cause they had spunk and courage and where with all. They didnt care I started a fight with a meat head 21 year old douche bag guy cause he only tipped his waitress $1.50 on a $18.50 tab. ( I called him out on it)…. they embraced it. They supported me. Because I was right. I didnt stand down when he had had enough of my angry stares and threw a dollar at me…. (true)…. I was like ” you cheap bastard who CLEARLY tans in a tanning bed, HIT ME”. The pussy spent the rest of the night with me standing my ground in the front row with his friends in between us….. ( I mean it was awesome…. I felt free….. I felt like Taylor saying she misses being 22 WHEN SHE IS ONLY 23… (I dont get that, but I get the reference being 38))……. to be free….free of mortgages, health insurance, car payments, phone bills. and in my case “the right pictures” and agent and management……. just to be FREE…. to call things like an umpire “like you see it”……… If you can do it….EMBRACE IT….. yep… I had some shots, but for the record I didnt puke and I knew my kids were in good hands ( my mom). I can go home now knowing I got that vacation, that I needed…. And I know I have a charmed life…. but no matter what life you have or what hand you are dealt, there are still responsibilities and guilt and expectations that come with it. YOU ARE ALLOWED……. It is needed for you to remember the feeling of being 10 years old and being pushed on a swing at the park……at letting go at the highest point…..flying in the air….. and landing on your feet……or not… and landing on your tailbone (done both)…….. release…Image

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About Vanessa Bednar

I am an actor, a writer, a mom, an adventurer.

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